Pat Parker24 February 2012 at 1:30pmPosts: 2683 (0 today)Status: offline
I will be straight up with you here and hope that you can accept what I have to say without assuming and accusing me of being mean, harsh, bullying, threatening, insane, or unstable. Please read what I have written, take time to absorb it, understand it and then act accordingly.
This will be the only contact I will make with you directly and I hope that it is understood as I wish it to be. I can only hope that it will be. There may be many who criticize me for taking the time to write you, but I'm not writing to you just for you, but for me also. I want to come here to the forums when I want to and am not here to do minesweeping, which is how many of the threads end up here. I'm doing this for "me" more than you and as I've said, it will be the only contact in this regard that I will have with you. I hope you understand.
Cyn, I haven't been on the forums all that regularly since November, 2011. I chose to stay away for many reasons -- personal and familunie reasons (the new forums and the lack of interesting topics (not the people)), the holidays had me very busy, etc., so I was away from here more than usual. I came here at Christmas to wish Happy Holidays and once here, I changed my profile photo to my new dog, Harry. I discovered at that time that I could not log out, so I jokingly changed my name to Lurkin' Login Logout -- because that's all I had intended to do.
The past few months have remained busy with me in my life and I have slowly checked back into the site here and was finding it to still be a bit slow with uneventful news (sorry, lunies, I mean no offense, but I wasn't all that entertained while here, so I didn't stay very much). I do not visit the Roundtable Discussions -- never really did, so if there was anything happening there, I didn't know.
I became a bit more active a few weeks ago and again, I was still having a problem with my login/logout and name changes. I created a few threads in Miscellaneous because I wanted to share some news, but I also knew it wasn't anything exciting and it was non-PG so I didn't want to bog down the PG threads with it. I checked back periodically to comment on some topics, etc.
Now, all this to say:
I believe you have been posting here for quite awhile under various names and it's all been good and quiet and peaceful -- I can't attest to that because I haven't been on here, but I take your word for it -- I believe you. Period. No other explanation needed.
Apparently, when Moonstorm asked you if you were Cyn, this current trouble started. All I know is this . . . why in the world would you be offended by someone asking you if you were you? (a bit wordy, I know, but I think you get my point). Really, Cyn, even if you did not like the phrasing of the sentence, the way in which she asked you, it is absolutely confusing to me as to why you would be so "offended" ???? So, if that is what has then caused all of this mess -- and it is a mess again, Cyn, please be adult enough to accept your part in it -- you're not alone, for sure, but you have to accept your share of the mess.
Cyn, you are entitled to post anything/everything you want -- we all share that same right here. However, whenever any of us lunatics have a disagreement or misunderstanding (and trust me, I'm the queen of that at times ), it's simply a matter of choosing to do one of two things: (1) take the time to resolve it and move on or (2) ignore it and cease communication with the person involved (if that's what you want) -- but all in all, we all just need to interact in the most civil ways and I believe you are capable of it and so are others. The key point is that when any of us say, "let it be" "move on" -- we must really, really, really mean it. In your case (and I'm not saying this to you in a mean or bullying way), Cyn, you really do not ever let it go. That is a serious problem because no matter what happens later (like currently), you will always bring up the past and it all begins again.
I realize it's very difficult to get past things that hurt us or bother us, but eventually we do. Using the past and our past mistakes is what helps us to become the people we are and helps us to make better decisions the next time.
These posts with angry, harsh, threatening, condescending, bullying discussions are so sad and disheartening to me -- this is NOT the place I used to love and it surely cannot be a good representation of what Peter Gabriel's website.
Please, please, please know that I wish you no harm, no ill will, no judgment, but I really must ask that you please take some time -- away from here perhaps and instead of writing anything directed to any of the lunies who you feel are harassing you, just think about something good and creative and write it. I know that you've been doing that for awhile, and I think that it will work best for you.
Know this, Cyn -- this is not about who has the last word, this is not about tit for tat; this is about what or who is important to YOU and I cannot think that any single one of us means enough to you to cause yourself to come here to this site (meant for pleasure) and get angry, upset and ill over it, really. Just go about your business, write and add to the forums just as you have in the past and trust me, it will all go away.
At the same time, I will tell you that there is a very good chance that many lunies will not discuss things with you here on the forums and will most likely ignore your posts. For that, I'm sad for you, but at the same time, it's again about accountability and responsibility for the things you've said in the past and more recent days. I'm sure you must understand why someone would not want to open up to you after they've been hurt by your words over and over and over again. Cyn, you are equally as responsible for the friction here - - surely you must be able to see it and recognize it.
One thing to note here: In all of the discussions of the past and the present, your words always have the same theme -- persecution -- you are always talking about how everyone else is out to get you (not those exact words, of course), how everyone else is a bully, how everyone else has done this, that or the other to "you". You then go on and on and on, using condescending words, calling people names like "dumb" etc., -- Do you see how contradictory that is? Do you see how you are acting in the very same manner? if not, worse? Do you realize that never once have you ever apologized -- truly wrote the words, "I'm really sorry that I went off the handle on . . ." but you expect everyone to be sorry and forgiving of you? (Please just take this one example and think about it).
Cyn, I hope that you will read this and take it seriously -- not as a mean, harsh threat and certainly not as any expert advice, but just from one person to another. In a recent post on another thread (I wish I could find it readily), you actually pledged to carry on without fighting -- I'd like to hold you to that if you don't mind.
My comments here aren't fighting words, but they are one final (and I do mean final) plea for you to please reconsider your reasons for coming here and know that you are as much a part of the forums as any one of us -- your contributions -- be they good or bad -- are a representation of you.
Lastly, I do not wish for anyone else to add anything to this thread unless they can do so without using threatening, harmful, mean words. I cannot control what others will or will not write or add to this thread, but I do seriously ask that no one adds any rude comments here. That goes for you, as well, Cyn. I hope you can really understand what I'm saying here and then choose how you want to conduct yourself from this point forward.
For all of the lunies, have a great day and weekend!